Although parents should be friends with their children, but the element of respect for parents cannot be ignored. In this modern era of Technology, if you are not friends with your children it can bring drastic results. Befriending your children doesn’t mean that they don’t respect you anymore. Maintaining respect with children benefits children more than parents. Here are a few tips to gain respect from your children:
1. Set rules:
Setting rules for telling your children what you expect out of them is a very effective technique for making your child well mannered. Children who know what their parents expect out of them from early age try to expect the same thing out of them. Hence they know which way to go from very early age.
“Children who understand that there are well-defined boundaries learn how to self-regulate and to respect limits,” says Hal Runkel, family therapist and author of ScreamFree Parenting.
2. Explain them the reason:
Parents do not have to give long explanations to their child for their behaviour. But if your children know that why have you set certain rules, they are more likely to adapt them.
For example “put your toys back into the toy box because next time when you will want to play with them you will find them easily.”
Do not prolong it into a lecture. A brief reason is enough for them to know the importance of the chore. If you will start explaining them children will lose attention and the main point will stay there.
Children will always give importance and respect to your point of view.
3. Praise them:
“Whether it’s making the bed, helping set the table, or letting his sister play with his blocks, make sure you reinforce rule-following by celebrating your child’s successes,” says Larry J. Koenig, PhD, author of Smart Discipline.
Encouraging them on little things is very important. These little things are actually making their foundations, if you encourage them they will know that these are the things that we need to hold on to.Also, they will know that their parents praise them when they do something nice.
For example “You were sharing your toys with your sister, that was very nice of you.” Or ” it’s very nice that you have started making your bed on your own now, you are a big girl now.”
4. Conscience:
Consience is a very crucial part of brought up. For example your child didn’t put his toys back in their place. When you reminded them they felt guilty. Let them feel guilty for a while do not try to satisfy them. This will help them in identifying rights from wrong.
Do not try to minimise their feeling of guilt. Make them feel uncomfortable if they don’t follow a rule.
If they have hit someone and are feeling guilty. Let them feel that for a little while. It will help them develop empathy which is also another important part of their development.
If you follow these steps, there is a greater chance that your child will know the importance of your words and your rules. They will respect them and you. Which, in future, will help them become a good human being for society also.
Everything related to raising Up a child needs patience. It is not a one night process.
Moms can do it 